The memory of a life gone by

by Bill Harper on May 4, 2012

Eight years ago today my mother passed away.

I can still remember a lot about that day. The phone call from my father telling me about the second stroke. Telling Lynda. Sending my lecturer an email to say I wouldn’t be in class that evening. The long drive to Ipswich hospital.

Hugging my father when I arrived. And my sister, her eyes red from tears and lack of sleep. Holding my mother’s hand and talking to her while they both went home to rest. Calling them both back to the hospital after being told my mother wasn’t going to make it.

In the final hours, trying to function as normally as we could, knowing full well things would never be normal again. Sensing our mother in pain, asking for more morphine, all the while watching the numbers on the various displays counting down.

And then that horrible drawn-out tone that tells you the fight is over.

The drive home seemed even longer, despite the roads being practically empty at that time of night. Listening to Ultravox’s “Dancing with tears in my eyes” and fighting back my own.

Dancing with tears in my eyes
Weeping for the memory of a life gone by
Dancing with tears in my eyes
Living out a memory of a love that died

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Geography sucks

by Bill Harper on April 23, 2012

When Angie and I first got together back in November, we knew it would be tough being so far apart.

Unfortunately neither of us realised just how tough it was going to be.

Thanks to the Internet there are now dozens of ways to keep in touch with people—email, Twitter, Skype, etc. And as far as friendships go, that’s pretty much all you need.

But when you’re in a relationship it’s not enough. You want to actually be with each other so you can hold hands, share moments together, and be there when your partner wants to be hugged or even just held. And that’s the one aspect of bringing people closer together the Internet hasn’t solved yet.

As I said in my earlier post, we both have kids and other commitments that stop us from packing up and moving to another country any time soon. And while being together for two or three weeks when we can afford a plane ticket is nice, it’s not enough.

And so, regrettably, we’ve ended the relationship and are no longer together.

Before I flew to the UK we promised each other we’d stay friends no matter what, and we’re keeping that promise. Admittedly it’s taking a bit of time for me to adjust, but I’m getting there.

Yes, it’s sad the relationship ended over something so seemingly trivial as geography. But we still had an incredible time together, and I for one will cherish those moments forever.

As Dr. Seuss wrote, “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened”.

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Six things I don’t miss about the day job

March 6, 2012

It’s been about eight months now since I quit my day job and became a freelancer. (It sounds so much better than “unemployed”, don’t you think?) And while I’m a long way from fending off clients with a stick and shopping for another Porsche (or even a first), it’s still the best decision I’ve ever [...]

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The post that shouldn’t be here

February 15, 2012

I really shouldn’t be writing this post. It’s just after midnight, and while it’s no longer Valentine’s Day here in Australia, the most romantic day of the year (according to Hallmark) is still going in other parts of the world. Including Canada. That’s where I was supposed to be today (or yesterday, depending on your [...]

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It’s complicated

November 17, 2011

Dear Facebook: You need to offer more options for “Relationship status”. Honestly, I spent the best part of 15 minutes debating which one I should choose. The closest one there is “It’s complicated”, but in my case that’s like saying the Grand Canyon is “a big hole”. What I really need is something like “You [...]

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Out-dated

August 7, 2011

Nine months. Hundreds of submissions. Dozens of rejections. Even more non-responses. And in the few times I was accepted, I never made it past the first interview. So I think it’s time I gave up on Internet dating. It was fun at first—coming up with a profile that made me seem interesting without lying, adding [...]

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Starting my new career on my backside

July 22, 2011

My new office chair arrived today. Now that may not seem like a big deal to you, but it certainly was to me. It means I can finally put the dining room chair back in the dining room. And even though I doubt I’ll have five people sitting with me at the dinner table any [...]

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Footprints in the text

June 5, 2010

In the past I’ve talked about the editing process, and how whenever I edit someone else’s work I seem to leave footprints in their text. Well, I think I’ve finally conquered that problem. Today I received an advanced copy of “A practical guide to Information Architecture”, the book I spend a month or so editing [...]

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A quick note

April 20, 2010

It’s been a while since I last blogged (and even that blog was a long time coming), so I thought I’d touch base and let you know what’s happening. Okay, let me start by telling you I haven’t given up blogging. I realise I’ve dropped the ball in terms of posting every day (though it [...]

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First contact

April 10, 2010

I’ve only been away a week and a half, but it feels like a lifetime. We’ve just returned from our holiday at Lake Cathie (pronounced Cat-Eye, apparently), where we shared a holiday house with some great friends of ours. And apart from a dozen tweets and a few Facebook updates it was pretty much technology-free. [...]

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